Matrimonial Blockhead Award #1

wael on July 3rd, 2009

As you know, I own and manage the Muslim matrimonial service called I screen all the profiles personally and I can say that the vast majority are written by sincere, kind, good people.

We do sometimes get unappealing profiles, however. Maybe they are superficial, or seeking an illicit affair, or simply strange.

I’ve decided to create an award called the “Matrimonial Blockhead Award” for the most ridiculous, moronic profiles that I come across.

Matrimonial Blockhead Award #1 goes to a Pakistani man who submitted a profile a few days ago. I deleted the profile and I will not reveal his name, but he made what he clearly thought was a generous offer to women. He offered the women one of two choices:

1. Any woman in Europe or North America could marry him and sponsor him to come to her country. She would support him until he becomes established, and then he would fulfill his duties as husband.

2. OR, ¬†the woman could sign what he called a “fake marriage contract” to bring him to her country. His pledge was that once he got a job he would pay her a portion of his income for ten years.

Okay, that’s pretty bad. But that’s not why he’s getting the Blockhead award. You see, in case the woman in question might have doubts about getting paid, this man offered to sign a contract specifying the terms, so she would be protected.

Ha ha ha! Idiot! It is a crime! If you sign a contract outlining the terms of the crime, that is evidence in court against both of you!

Congratulations, winner of Matrimonial Blockhead Award #1. You win a t-shirt saying “I am a Matrimonial Blockhead”, a lifetime subscription to Dummies Anonymous, and a block of gouda cheese. To claim your prizes, send me your name and address written on a $100 bill, lol.

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